November 21st 7:34pm – The Castro on Halloween… Enough Said

College athletes inevitably amalgamate. At USF, the Women’s Volleyball team primarily dated the Men’s Soccer Team, the Women’s Soccer Team: Men’s Baseball. Some on the Women’s Soccer and Volleyball teams cultivated friendships. The day after Halloween my sophomore year I inquired how the night before was. The following is the story I received from Volleyball:
A few of the Volleyball girls, in unruly, big-haired, flamboyant-colored wigs, valiantly schlepped scantily clad to the Castro (for the record: that year two of my teammates braved the Castro naked, bodies concealed only by a skinny layer of paint). Amid two hundred revelers and raucous dipsomaniacs, the Volleyball girls appealed to a man costumed in bum attire to take their picture. He willingly consented and paced backward to allow all in the camera’s frame. The girls posed, colossal smiles, vibrant arms around multihued bodies. Bum retreated several steps, camera elevated. One of the girls chuckled as a drunken man on stilts staggered past. Bum twirled and hurtled into the hordes, camera in hand, picture untaken. Most girls would screech and snivel. Volleyball girls bellowed in exasperation and tore after him. Dodging through a man dressed as a kissing booth, the cast of Napoleon Dynamite, and Britney Spears (pregnant belly in one hand, baby in another), they perceived him some steps away. One of the girls sprinted and launched herself football-tackle at him. Her arms enveloped Bum’s chest and her bulk crushed into his, bodily forcing him onto the concrete. Within three minutes of Bum’s attempted flight, one girl ensconced his derriere, while another sat on his back, stocking-adorned legs on either side of his head. Her hands enveloped in his shaggy hair, she repeatedly struck his head against the street, reiterating, “Don’t steal from girls!”