June 26th 11:13am - Vegas Roof Lechery

During the day, while consuming enough Tequila and Whiskey to fell a 110ft blue whale, we resolved a roof excursion was as essential as food. A fantastic front desk clerk had placed us on the top floor of the hotel - the twenty-seventh - despite our $22/night pre-determined rate. After inebriating ourselves in the room, we sprinted down the hallway with glasses of alcohol in hand and bound up the stairs to discover the roof access door locked.
MacGyver jimmied the fastened door open with a credit card, we strode over some obstacles, and were on the roof like Batman. We resided there a few minutes, bolstered the door open with a shovel, and stumbled our way down to the pool, ascertaining we would return that night.

Past 2am, after the Gas Station Girls vacated, a friend attending UNLV joined us. As previously ordained, we relocated to the roof, complete with Jose Cuervo and Maker's Mark.
Yes Man chronicled his campaign hours earlier in finding the Gas Station Girls in the casino. He had drifted downstairs with Maker's Mark in hand and conversed with John the Security Man concerning the whiskey. John divulged he had consumed Maker's Mark the night before. Yes Man revealed his Gas Station Girls quest and when he returned to the elevator flanked by girls, John nodded and smiled as if Yes Man had just won the presidency.
"I made friends with John the Security Man!" Yes Man announced with the pomp of a high school cheerleader and a sip of his Whiskey.
With the hours lapsing and the alcohol amplifying, Yes Man proclaimed he yearned to pitch something off the roof. He tossed the hotel room glass he was gulping from onto the concrete parking structure below. UNLV catapulted his glass. The Maker's Mark bottle buffeted the ground.
With the spring of sunrise, we walked through the door and down the only stairwell from the roof with bandit silence. Two security guards ascended as we descended. They gazed at us with prison-guard stoniness.
"Were you guys throwing glass bottles and glasses off the roof?" Fidel Castro asked.
"No... we were just up there for a moment looking at the view," we replied.
"What floor are you staying on?"
"Twenty-four," UNLV said.
"Ok... go back to your room," Security ordered.
"Yessir. Have a good night!" I responded.
We entered the elevator as silent as koalas and went to the twenty-fourth floor before going back to the twenty-seventh.
We exited the elevator to find the two security guards who had just questioned us in the hallway.
"Umm, goodnight," UNLV said as we walked to our room.
Once inside, Yes Man declared, "One of those security guards was my friend John! And he knew it was us because of the Maker's Mark bottle we threw. He saw me carrying that earlier! YES! I love making friends. He saved us!"

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