Parrot: "I feel like sex with T-Rex always ends with an apology."
Pakistan: "Smell this. It smells awesome."
Me: "Mmmm, cinnamon."
Parrot (smells it): "Is this chewing tobacco?"
Pakistan: "It's soap!"
Pakistan: "Even those children Parrot was working with were attractive."
*Note: kids were 8-17 years old*
Ass-Flash: "No wonder you were telling me yesterday that the sex registry is a bad idea."
Sinner: "The fact that I know where I am is good."
T-Rex (singing): "And then I go agh ungh agh agh ungh (with pelvic thrust) in her va-jay-jay."
Sinner: "Exact quote from the girl I'm texting: 'I'm not gonna lie, I made out with three guys last night.' Oh, and her name's Candy."
T-Rex: "I need to find a girl with low self-esteem that will let me stick my pee-pee in her mouth."
Me: "Kissing is easy, you just have to rape a girl's mouth."
T-Rex: "If I was gonna rape a girl's mouth it wouldn't be with my mouth."
Sinner: "A lot of girls say things that T-Rex might say, they just say it a lot less."
T-Rex: "You should hear the stuff I don't say. You're hearing the censored shit."
Sinner: "If girls like wrinkled shirts and weird neck hair, I'm in."
Sinner: "She wasn't great. She wasn't good."
T-Rex: "I think I'm going to lower my standards tonight."
Delight: "Tell me what that means so I can stop you from doing anything you'll regret."
T-Rex: "No one with a dick."