January 7th 1:20pm - Vegas 2010 You Know You're Drunk When...

Vegas 2010. You Know You're Drunk When...

* You calculate walking on your knees feasible.

* You get kicked out of a casino for sitting on the floor without shoes.

* You were going to take two girls to a strip club and hook up with one of them, but you were too tired. You didn't go to the strip club.

* You put your hand down your friend's dress, fingering her boob. She doesn't notice. There is picture evidence.

* You buy a man shots at a bar because he asks the guy you're drinking with if he's in the military. Five shots later, the man escorts you and your friend up to your group's hotel room. You don't remember his name. You continually call him Ryan when his name is Brian. You leave with him, and return shit-housed at eight-thirty in the morning after gambling all night. You pass some friends in the hallway who ask you where Brian is. Your response: "Who's Brian?" Theirs: "Oh God. Room's that way."

* You dance with a forty-five-year-old black woman with an afro. After dancing for an hour, you say, "Alright, let's go up to your room." You black-out and don't remember her response. You assume she said no.

* You fall asleep in the bed. Your friend falls asleep fully clothed lying in the wrong direction on top of the covers. A hot Aussie awakens him at 4:30am by dripping water on his head.

* You leave your switchblade open in the bed. The girl also sleeping in the bed wakes up with the blade digging into her neck.
* You entice two Aussies to go with you to the hotel room you share with eight others. You want the hot one but hook up with the less attractive one instead, in a room already occupied.

* You are in Vegas for two nights. Someone walks you home both nights. While everyone packs up cars the morning of departure, you lie on the cement outside the casino.

1 comment:

Erika Erikovna said...

Well done!! Haha. I like where my nick name is coming from, but it makes me sound slighly more annoying than I hope I am. Fair though. ;) Miss you too!!